Pregnant huh?!

SO funny story, Sam will get a kick out of this.
Yesterday while driving around running many errons with the girls, my mind swirls with thoughts from what do I need to do next, where am I going from here, when the heck will I see my husband again and oh yes, this last thought sent me on a wild ride, when did I get my 'monthly' last? Oh Yes ladies, you know the thought. Like a brick wall. Might seem like way too much information but after this story you will see why I ask myself this every now and again.
Well I just could not remember so....... this lead to the next thought.
Am I FLIPPIN PREGNANT?
Later that night I sat here on the couch and while the girls slept, took a test. Well sure enough, BINGO.. PREGERS. Now I am shaking. And as most of you know already, not the greatest timing. I mean, Hello, WE ARE MOVING to another state in just 3 weeks. So I try to muster up some joy in this moment and take a picture of the test and send it to Sam's cell. And wait..............and wait some more.
He has the nerve to send a picture of this slap happy grin smile back on my phone. Now I am unraveling and crying, thinking what the heck is soooooooo funny to him! Does he have any idea. Well no. And not for lack of a sensitivity chip or anything but if you must know. If my husband was a woman, he would be pregnant right now. It's me who wants to enjoy our family, AS IS for the moment.
So we end up talking minutes later and settle ourselves and pray and go to bed for the evening.
I slept like a rock by the way.
The next morning, still very present with the new news, I go to the drug store to pick up 2 more tests. Yes ladies, you have all done it. Maybe even more. Taken as many as you needed for confirmation on what you already know. Don't know why we do it but we do.
Come home and sure enough, 2 more positives. Well at least that was my first thought. Yes, until I read the instructions. Can someone tell me how you have 2 children, taken umpteen pregnancy tests and read a BIG FAT NEGATIVE SIGN WRONG!Well that's me for you. Totally embarrassed by my huge mistake, dumbness, whatever you want to label it as, I call Sam and let him know I am NOT prefers, I read the test wrong and never want to hear about this again. EVER!
We all got a good laugh and I am not allowed to check my own fertility again. All testing will be supervised in the future by husband or close friend.
Friends don't let friends take pregnancy tests alone.
I think this move has me in another world. Seriously. Now thinking how selfish I sounded for all my reasons why this was so inconvenient, I was kinda sad to know it was not true or positive. So I would have been joyful, after the initial shock wore off.
Nonetheless, it was funny and we all got a kick out of it.
So no WE ARE NOT PREGNANT and we are ok with that or whatever else God delivers this year.